Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Debate...

I was watching the Dr Oz show the other day.  He was talking about food and whether it was addictive or just emotional.  As I've been thinking about this for a couple of days, I can to this conclusion.  I think it's both!  I think we eat because of different emotional things...stress, lonely, nervous, happy, whatever.  But I think the foods we eat during those times can be addictive.  I have always had a problem with eating the wrong foods when I have those emotions. I don't go to the fruits or veggies, I go to the chips and chocolate!!  I am however now changing that and reprogramming my brain to go to the better foods.  It is very hard! I went through 3 days of head aches, and being tired.  I didn't understand why at first but then I realized it was the lack of fatty, sweet foods.  Now don't get me wrong, I still have the occasional yummy just not all the time.  I've been feeling so much better and loosing weight too! 

Now to branch off a little bit.  Because I've ALWAYS had this "issue" with food I've never had to deal with the other side of it.  Not eating and being too skinny.  As most of you know, Nellie has ADHD and is on meds.  She has been on them for almost 2 years now.  They have helped her so much! She is able to concentrate at school and is doing great!  The only down side is that the meds make you not hungry.  Now Nellie is a smaller girl anyway, and with this she is very thin.  We go to the dc every 2 months to have her checked and she is doing ok... mostly.  Until this last time.  She has lost 2 lbs and isn't growing.  This is partially because she doesn't sleep much, and you grow when you sleep.  She has been on different sleep aids but still she stays awake.  
When talking with her dc he said that anything I wouldn't eat, give it to her! Give her the fat stuff, peanut butter, milk shakes, butter.  Just not fatty sugary foods (she doesn't need the sugar :) )  The problem is that I can't get her to even eat that!  Last night I sat with her at the table for 2 1/2 hours just for her to eat a very small amount of spaghetti.  We talked about eating and how important it was.  She says she's never hungry.  The dc told me to literally make her eat the food. It's so hard when people say, don't force her to eat or if you give her that she'll be fat.   I'm doing what the dc has told me to do and what I feel is right for her.  I feel like you can't have a middle.  You're either too skinny and people judge you for that, or you're too fat and people judge you for that.  No one knows what the other person is going through, or why they are doing what they are doing.  We are all at different stages in life.  

I didn't want to go on a tangent, I just wanted to put it out there and see how other people feel on this subject.  

4 comments:

kirsten.brooke said...

Wow. That is so difficult! For both you and Nellie. I'm sorry you have to go through this. But, like other issues you and Patrick have come across as parents, you'll come through just fine.

Personally, if the Dr. is skilled, experienced and educated, and he's telling you to do one thing, and you're momma instincts feel good about his advice? Go with it. And don't apologize to those that will second guess both his knowledge and your feelings.

Frankly, I'm a bit jealous of Nellie getting to eat so much yummy goodness by doctor's orders!

But I digress, not feeling hungry and not being able to sleep must be difficult for an 8 year old to deal with.

On a more positive note, good for you for giving up what you love so that you can feel better.

I've found that I'm most pleased with my body when I eat well and exercise not because of how it looks, but for how amazing I feel. Keep up the good work! You're awesome.

Michelle said...

Ah...so I'm not there with an 8 year old yet, but Jenna has always been severely underweight. At 2 years she is only 20 lbs. We spend many a night at the table trying to get her to eat things. And you can only force a two year old so much. After a lot of stress I finally had to step back and say, she's healthy and she's happy and I'm doing the best I can. Struggling with food is not fun. I hope Nellie is able to eat and sleep much better soon!

Katherine said...

I have a few random thoughts on this topic...
First, when I was at BYU, I took a nutrition class and learned about 'intuitive eating'. I pretty much ate junk up to that point because it tasted good and I had an extremely fast metabolism. I thought it was ridiculous because if you ate whatever sounded good, you would just eat ice cream, right? Anyway, I tried 'intuitive eating' in combination with striving to follow the food pyramid better and discovered that my craving really did compare with what I was lacking in the food pyramid. Sometimes, I just had to find a healthy alternative (craving red meat? have some protein and iron). I started feeling AWESOME! If I felt off, I'd review what I had eaten that day and see what I was missing (yeah, I ended up having green beans for a bedtime snack a few times before I got into the swing of things) My favorite detail from that class? A cup and a half of ice cream is a serving of dairy :)
Okay, so on the flip side, there are also times that the very idea of eating makes be nauseated. I just have no desire to eat. Since I am somewhat anemic, I know I will end up with some pretty bad side effects if I don't eat regularly. Sometimes I just have to make myself eat. That reasoning will probably not help an eight year old. Sometimes, I imagine I am chewing and then figure out what I am imagining I am chewing and that helps me figure out something I can handle eating (that could help?). Ella has always been a really good eater until about 2-3 months ago. If we don't get her to eat, SHE IS INSANE the rest of the day and doesn't sleep well. We discovered she will eat something if it is something 'prefered' by whatever/whoever she is pretending to be that day (read 'pirate bread', 'ballerina crackers', and 'minion snacks')...which also may not be helpful for an 8 year old...good luck! If she comes up with something that sounds good and you don't have a recipe, let me know, I have been experimenting a lot lately! :)

Halsey said...

Oh Mettina! Tough issues here. You will both come through just fine because of who YOU are, I'm sure. Ellyn Satter has some great books on kids and eating. They have helped me deal with KJ's sudden finicky eating. I agree with Kirsten; do what YOU feel good about.